Speaking as one of the singularly blessed few who moved away from home at 17 and never darkened their parents doorstep again (well, I do visit, but rarely for more than a few days a year), I'd say that whatever you write in your journal is an expression that does not require or request parental supervision.
I've stated before that I was raised by rather strange people, but while I was always allowed to make my own decisions and my own mistakes, they believed that their function was simply to provide me with as much information and support as possible and be there to catch me if I fell.
Thanks to their encouragement, I fell very, very rarely.
I moved away, went to college, got married and became a widow all before I was 24. I write _very_ disturbing stuff, yet (when my doctor sent me to a psychiastrist because of stress interfering with my various medical problems) I was told that I'm incredibly well-adjusted, very brave, independant and a delightful conversationalist.
Despite my 'disturbing' writings, I'm not only apparently quite 'well-adjusted', I own a beautiful, four bedroom home (with a housemate), am a responsible, tax-paying citizen and work for the government.
My parents have chosen to support me in everything I do, despite my tendencies to do such things as dash off to go clubbing, hang out with strange and mildly disturbed people, indulge in trips to meet strangers thousands of miles away and write things for yaoi-based contests.
Hell, my father _read_ my entry and made comments on it. My mother asked me for a signed copy of one of my stories. My mother edits some of my original stuff and my father provides translation and technical support for 'Something Missing'.
Neither of them would dream of reading anything that I write or my livejournal without my express permission, even though it is in a public forum because they are my parents and feel that I should not have to feel as though they are spying on me.
They do, however, have my permission, because I trust them not to give me a hard time and because I know that they will not judge me. The upbringing that my parents gave me was based on trust and because they trusted me, implicitly, I trust them.
A sample conversation:
Parental units: You do realize that you can come to us for anything. Me *12 year old skepticism showing*: Right. Dad: Anything. We're your parents, and that's what parents do. Me: And if I murdered someone? Mom *not missing a beat*: We'd try to talk you into turning yourself over to the police, find you a very good lawyer, post bail and, if necessary, visit you every Thursday.
Parents, in my narrow and jaundiced view, have a job to see to it that you reach college age healthy. As long as you are financially dependant on them, they have a right to be worried about you and impose certain rules. I do not, however, feel that those rules extend to making psychological diagnoses based on what you choose to write.
Teenagers suffer from a great deal of completely chemical and hormone based angst. Most of them can't help it. This is a medically and psychologically proven fact. Parents really need to go out and read up on what it really means, mentally, to be a teenager. Most of them don't remember and really will not ever be able to understand. Hearing another adult telling them that they're worrying unneccesarily will sometimes help.
Parental based rant I
I've stated before that I was raised by rather strange people, but while I was always allowed to make my own decisions and my own mistakes, they believed that their function was simply to provide me with as much information and support as possible and be there to catch me if I fell.
Thanks to their encouragement, I fell very, very rarely.
I moved away, went to college, got married and became a widow all before I was 24. I write _very_ disturbing stuff, yet (when my doctor sent me to a psychiastrist because of stress interfering with my various medical problems) I was told that I'm incredibly well-adjusted, very brave, independant and a delightful conversationalist.
Despite my 'disturbing' writings, I'm not only apparently quite 'well-adjusted', I own a beautiful, four bedroom home (with a housemate), am a responsible, tax-paying citizen and work for the government.
My parents have chosen to support me in everything I do, despite my tendencies to do such things as dash off to go clubbing, hang out with strange and mildly disturbed people, indulge in trips to meet strangers thousands of miles away and write things for yaoi-based contests.
Hell, my father _read_ my entry and made comments on it. My mother asked me for a signed copy of one of my stories. My mother edits some of my original stuff and my father provides translation and technical support for 'Something Missing'.
Neither of them would dream of reading anything that I write or my livejournal without my express permission, even though it is in a public forum because they are my parents and feel that I should not have to feel as though they are spying on me.
They do, however, have my permission, because I trust them not to give me a hard time and because I know that they will not judge me. The upbringing that my parents gave me was based on trust and because they trusted me, implicitly, I trust them.
A sample conversation:
Parental units: You do realize that you can come to us for anything.
Me *12 year old skepticism showing*: Right.
Dad: Anything. We're your parents, and that's what parents do.
Me: And if I murdered someone?
Mom *not missing a beat*: We'd try to talk you into turning yourself over to the police, find you a very good lawyer, post bail and, if necessary, visit you every Thursday.
Parents, in my narrow and jaundiced view, have a job to see to it that you reach college age healthy. As long as you are financially dependant on them, they have a right to be worried about you and impose certain rules. I do not, however, feel that those rules extend to making psychological diagnoses based on what you choose to write.
Teenagers suffer from a great deal of completely chemical and hormone based angst. Most of them can't help it. This is a medically and psychologically proven fact. Parents really need to go out and read up on what it really means, mentally, to be a teenager. Most of them don't remember and really will not ever be able to understand. Hearing another adult telling them that they're worrying unneccesarily will sometimes help.
TBC